Is it absolutely shameless to say that I admire myself sometimes?
If so, I'd like you to promptly go to hell. Just kidding - I don't really mean that at all.
I'm just sort of reveling in the quietude of my summer. I love my room and my bed, but mostly my stash of favorite books that I read and reread whenever I'm home.
I could never have a TV in my room - I think it seriously disrupts the idea of peace and rest that your room should bring you. Mine is my sanctuary. So is my diary. If you wanted a real look inside my head, you'd have to find it. I don't recommend it. You might die.
Again, I kid.
Generally speaking, I like to find certain things to admire in other people. Qualities I myself lack, or some similarity. Positive things. I find that people on the whole are far too negative, especially in regard to themselves. If we all practiced a little more self-love, maybe we'd make actual progress.
Something I admire in myself is that I'm brave enough to be alone. I don't feel the compulsion to be with someone, because my happiness does not hinge on it. It will not make or break my future or really any of my decisions. Of course, that will change with time, once I find someone who is worth it. But they don't have to hurry back - I'll catch up to them.
Labels for this post: Zen, sanctuary, free
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Thursday, June 11, 2009
I'm just not an introvert
I've been taking an online class since school was out, and I am failing it miserably. Why? Because I have no idea what's going on. I had no idea I had about seven assignments missing until I received a list yesterday about them - and even then, I'm pretty sure I've turned in at least three of those "missing" assignments.
I'm not angry, just resigned. Without the buffer of twenty other people, general education seems kind-of pointless. Actually, it seems a lot pointless.
Anyway.
I'm attempting to find a job, and it just gets gradually sillier. There's a wonderful coffee shop in our downtown area who will need someone in July, approximately right before I leave to go to Boston. I can't do that to a business, especially a small local business in this economy. I adore small businesses.
I really want to move. As in, to Italy or Germany. I can get to both of those places from either of those places. If I love Europe in theory, it will just be that much better when I actually go there. I'm totally going. I don't know when, but I am definitely boarding a Lufthansa. I hope there will be cake.
I think I'm a bitch. Secretly. The kind of bitch that you don't really expect because I'm a nice person. I'd like to reassure you that I really am a genuinely nice person and that this is just a by-product of a blow to my self-esteem, but I don't think that's true.
The other night, I went to a party. There was a guy there who was very much not my type: blonde, blue-eyed, and a musclehead. He tried to scam on me but I tactfully discouraged him. Later in the evening he came up to me and said, "I'm in love with you," and looked at me very seriously. I laughed, then said, "Yeah, right." And I left. Did I ever mention I think opportunists are disgusting?
Labels for this post: Gen Eds, opportunity, cost
I'm not angry, just resigned. Without the buffer of twenty other people, general education seems kind-of pointless. Actually, it seems a lot pointless.
Anyway.
I'm attempting to find a job, and it just gets gradually sillier. There's a wonderful coffee shop in our downtown area who will need someone in July, approximately right before I leave to go to Boston. I can't do that to a business, especially a small local business in this economy. I adore small businesses.
I really want to move. As in, to Italy or Germany. I can get to both of those places from either of those places. If I love Europe in theory, it will just be that much better when I actually go there. I'm totally going. I don't know when, but I am definitely boarding a Lufthansa. I hope there will be cake.
I think I'm a bitch. Secretly. The kind of bitch that you don't really expect because I'm a nice person. I'd like to reassure you that I really am a genuinely nice person and that this is just a by-product of a blow to my self-esteem, but I don't think that's true.
The other night, I went to a party. There was a guy there who was very much not my type: blonde, blue-eyed, and a musclehead. He tried to scam on me but I tactfully discouraged him. Later in the evening he came up to me and said, "I'm in love with you," and looked at me very seriously. I laughed, then said, "Yeah, right." And I left. Did I ever mention I think opportunists are disgusting?
Labels for this post: Gen Eds, opportunity, cost
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Unfair
If you've ever said something bad about me, you're probably right. I really do need to be more respectful and keep my word. Don't defend me. I didn't.
I'm sorry if what I think isn't what you'd like to hear. I'm sorry for inspiring any sort of hatred or ill will. I don't hate anybody or anything.
From now on, I'm going to do my best to just not say anything. Nothing nice, and nothing mean. Just nothing. Which is what I said I would do and should have done. Now, it's really over.
Goodbye, youth.
There is a bucket of rocks in my basement, and I'm not entirely sure why.
I really hate online classes. They weigh upon my soul.
I was just in New York for some family stuff, and I had an ice cream soda (very tasty).
I wish I had a job in retail, though I understand why I'm not an ideal candidate for hire.
I wish oatmeal was an alternate fuel, like in the Quaker Oats commercials where the people are flying around on Quaker Oat jetpacks.
And I wish I could go on a date with Andy Samberg. Holler!
Just letting you know what's up. I promise to be more poetic next time and describe that ever-receding intersection of chemistry, humor, intelligence, and tall. My own personal Jim Halpert.
Labels for this post: resolution, whatcha upta?, ice cream soda
I'm sorry if what I think isn't what you'd like to hear. I'm sorry for inspiring any sort of hatred or ill will. I don't hate anybody or anything.
From now on, I'm going to do my best to just not say anything. Nothing nice, and nothing mean. Just nothing. Which is what I said I would do and should have done. Now, it's really over.
Goodbye, youth.
There is a bucket of rocks in my basement, and I'm not entirely sure why.
I really hate online classes. They weigh upon my soul.
I was just in New York for some family stuff, and I had an ice cream soda (very tasty).
I wish I had a job in retail, though I understand why I'm not an ideal candidate for hire.
I wish oatmeal was an alternate fuel, like in the Quaker Oats commercials where the people are flying around on Quaker Oat jetpacks.
And I wish I could go on a date with Andy Samberg. Holler!
Just letting you know what's up. I promise to be more poetic next time and describe that ever-receding intersection of chemistry, humor, intelligence, and tall. My own personal Jim Halpert.
Labels for this post: resolution, whatcha upta?, ice cream soda
Friday, May 1, 2009
Fashion goals
I really think I want to turn this into a sort of "practice field" for any sort of fashion journalism...that includes comments posted by my friends who are also fabulous.
It would be so cool to have a site like modcloth.com. SO cool.
I can't wait until they have another contest...this week they had a "Just for Kicks" contest where you had to name several pairs of shoes, and if you win, you win those shoes!
Unfortunately, I only got in on it today, which is the last day, and the shoes were these tall black and basket-woven twine straps. They were cute, but they didn't have the whimsy of many other modcloth items. That's okay - sometimes it's okay to be normal.
My suggestions, because I know you really care, were:
1) Let's e-rope!
2) Entwined by symmetry
3) Running 'drilles
4) Castanet wedge
Yeah, they are lame. I know. I have a really good one in mind, but only when they show something that I think will fit it perfectly.
I hope you don't think I'm superficial because I post a lot about fashion - I just happen to love it and how it can be tailored to express a multitude of perspectives.
This Summer I am Going To:
-Go to Yellowstone to complete English 400
-Find something vintage for a decent price
-Make my own "Alice in Wonderland" themed graphic tees
-Stay healthy
-Spend more time with my friends
-Read
-Play outside
-Visit the Ridge at least once (but probably a lot more)
-Be happy
You should, too.
Goodnight, future fashionistas.
Labels for this post: writing fashion, Alice, summertide
It would be so cool to have a site like modcloth.com. SO cool.
I can't wait until they have another contest...this week they had a "Just for Kicks" contest where you had to name several pairs of shoes, and if you win, you win those shoes!
Unfortunately, I only got in on it today, which is the last day, and the shoes were these tall black and basket-woven twine straps. They were cute, but they didn't have the whimsy of many other modcloth items. That's okay - sometimes it's okay to be normal.
My suggestions, because I know you really care, were:
1) Let's e-rope!
2) Entwined by symmetry
3) Running 'drilles
4) Castanet wedge
Yeah, they are lame. I know. I have a really good one in mind, but only when they show something that I think will fit it perfectly.
I hope you don't think I'm superficial because I post a lot about fashion - I just happen to love it and how it can be tailored to express a multitude of perspectives.
This Summer I am Going To:
-Go to Yellowstone to complete English 400
-Find something vintage for a decent price
-Make my own "Alice in Wonderland" themed graphic tees
-Stay healthy
-Spend more time with my friends
-Read
-Play outside
-Visit the Ridge at least once (but probably a lot more)
-Be happy
You should, too.
Goodnight, future fashionistas.
Labels for this post: writing fashion, Alice, summertide
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Don't
Do not tell me not to wear certain things, especially if you would like the opposite to happen.
1. Women – No overly revealing attire. No bare feet. Dress slacks (not colored jeans or khakis) and blouse, skirt (at least kneelength)
and blouse, or dress (at least knee-length); blouses/tops should cover your shoulders and have a conservative
neckline; dress shoes (no sandals, chunky shoes, or open toes) and tights, hose, or dress socks.
Taken from the syllabus of one of my professors.
My own particular brand of warfare is always subterfuge. I have my jury tomorrow, and I'm wearing a blouse, pencil skirt, hose, and heels.
You can bet that every single one of those will break the rules, but only in a subtle way.
Example: I am indeed wearing hose. Fishnets.
Suck it, dress code.
Labels for this post: rebellion, jury, bad ideas
1. Women – No overly revealing attire. No bare feet. Dress slacks (not colored jeans or khakis) and blouse, skirt (at least kneelength)
and blouse, or dress (at least knee-length); blouses/tops should cover your shoulders and have a conservative
neckline; dress shoes (no sandals, chunky shoes, or open toes) and tights, hose, or dress socks.
Taken from the syllabus of one of my professors.
My own particular brand of warfare is always subterfuge. I have my jury tomorrow, and I'm wearing a blouse, pencil skirt, hose, and heels.
You can bet that every single one of those will break the rules, but only in a subtle way.
Example: I am indeed wearing hose. Fishnets.
Suck it, dress code.
Labels for this post: rebellion, jury, bad ideas
Friday, April 24, 2009
Shark Attack
I promise there wasn't an actual shark attack; that would be much more alarming than a blog post. But there you are.
I'm wearing a t-shirt with a cartoon shark that says, "AAHHH!" at the bottom. It's easily the funniest item of clothing I have, and I totally wore it because I had my final fiction critique today.
Some people loved it, and a few hated it. My professor didn't really like it, because it wasn't fictional - it was "creative nonfiction" (oxymoron) so I'm not very pleased with it.
Some people were pretty harsh with it, even though it cleverly written, simply because it's specific to our generation (age o' technology) and our addiction to Facebook.
Also, it is funny. Funny is not allowed.
Then why do I want to write anything at all? I'm not an English major - I'm going to be a music teacher, and I resent that people gave me terrible critiques because I'm not trying to get published. Sue me.
I had some other large philosophical idea that I wanted to impress upon others, but I'm not sure if I feel like that anymore, after complaining excessively about my injured pride. Hmm.
Let's be more positive. I am going to the opera workshop concert tonight with a cute, funny boy who likes to read and play Super Smash Bros.
Yessssssss.
Labels for this post: defensive, random, AAHHH!
I'm wearing a t-shirt with a cartoon shark that says, "AAHHH!" at the bottom. It's easily the funniest item of clothing I have, and I totally wore it because I had my final fiction critique today.
Some people loved it, and a few hated it. My professor didn't really like it, because it wasn't fictional - it was "creative nonfiction" (oxymoron) so I'm not very pleased with it.
Some people were pretty harsh with it, even though it cleverly written, simply because it's specific to our generation (age o' technology) and our addiction to Facebook.
Also, it is funny. Funny is not allowed.
Then why do I want to write anything at all? I'm not an English major - I'm going to be a music teacher, and I resent that people gave me terrible critiques because I'm not trying to get published. Sue me.
I had some other large philosophical idea that I wanted to impress upon others, but I'm not sure if I feel like that anymore, after complaining excessively about my injured pride. Hmm.
Let's be more positive. I am going to the opera workshop concert tonight with a cute, funny boy who likes to read and play Super Smash Bros.
Yessssssss.
Labels for this post: defensive, random, AAHHH!
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
If you read this, you asked for it
I'm pulling an all-nighter tonight, unless I fall asleep at my piano (possibly). I'm also getting incredibly frustrated by the aforementioned piano, because I could definitely play this piece (at least the left hand) a month ago, and now I can barely play a page without stopping, messing up, or various other imperfections.
So, I'm going to fill out a silly, trivial survey. Shoot me.
DON'T CHICKEN OUT GIRLS!
Does your Facebook password have to do with a boy?
No, it's a very random code that has absolutely no significance to my daily life and work.
What's one thing a guy can do to make you like them?
A good sense of humor, genuine chivalry, a defined style
Are you a girly girl?
Physically, yes, I love dresses and shoes and I hate bugs. Emotionally, rarely.
Big or small purses?
Depends on the situation
Do you enjoy drama?
Uhhhh no. Not even remotely.
Did you dress up on Halloween?
Always! I was Alice in Wonderland (but not in a creepy schoolgirl fantasy-esque way)
Do you call anybody by their last name?
Lumia...for some people, it's full name basis
How many guys will read this just because it says "FEMALE SURVEY"?
Whooooooooo cares
Can you put on mascara without opening your mouth?
If I want to have war paint or look like Twiggy
Have you ever been called a bad influence?
Yes, generally when it comes to shopping or sex
Eyeliner or mascara?
I use both - I have short eyelashes
American Eagle or Hollister?
Even though neither of them are my style anymore, definitely AE
Heels or Flats?
Flats!!!! Too many of them!
Skirts or jeans?
Jean skirts...what now you mother bitchessss
Straight or curly hair?
Crazy hair! I love my hair!
Hoops or dangling earrining?
Dangles please
Do you prefer light or dark haired guys?
Dark haired, generally speaking, but there are always exceptions to these things
Do you have a best friend?
A few! I'm very lucky :)
Do you like your life?
Considering that there are people who barely live past the age of three and die of starvation and malnutrition and undergo civil wars where they're forced to kill their parents, I love absolutely everything about my overprivileged existence.
Ever walked into the guy's bathroom?
Probably, I don't really remember
Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on?
Yeah! it's fun!
Ever slapped a guy in the face?
Not seriously...I did once punch someone, and I almost broke my thumb
Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
Yes
Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind?
Indeed
Do you ever wish you were famous?
No, all the side effects of fame really turn me off
Preppy or Punk/goth?
I call my style "chic irreverence"
Yeah, it's pretty pretentious
Contacts or Glasses?
Neither...20/20 suckers
Good cook or take you out a lot?
Cook! Let's make dinner - I love cooking, and I am reasonably talented at it too!
Funny or Serious?
Funny, easily. You can tone down funny, but you can't really lift up Serious.
Long or short hair?
For me? Longer hair...for guys, whatever looks better, though I dig "just a little too long" short hair
Smoker or non-smoker?
NON - voice major
Tall or short?
Tall, please, I'm 5'7, babycakes
Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
If I like them too, why not? If not, I very politely decline any sort of invitation and distance myself for a while. It's pretty hurtful at the time, but I think it's better in the long run.
RANDOMS:
If you woke up in one of the Saw movies, do you think you could survive?
No, I seriously doubt it
When was the last time you were in a photobooth ?
I think I was 10, at Hershey Park or something...
Who was the last person you had a sleepover with?
Lindsey Fitz!
Have you ever seen someone you knew and purposely avoided seeing them?
Hahahahahah...yeah.
On average what do you think you cry about the most?
This should be pretty obvious if you know me at all
Do you have a friend of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to?
Yes, one, and it's a tenuous friendship at best
Who was the last guy you talked to?
Spoke to or hollered at? You have to make the distinction. Also, none of your bidness.
Do you think best friends can be replaced?
Replaced, no, but they can sort of fade into the background more, especially if you go to different schools and they never call you or you never call them.
Does the last person you held hands with mean a lot?
Yes - some of my sisters, who are wonderful =)
Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
I hope so. That's what I profess to do as an educator and musician.
Anything bothering you right now?
I have 4 things to prepare for tomorrow, and I'm sick, but I can't sleep because I don't have any time. Otherwise, it's pretty good, I'm kind of hungry, so I'mma make some ziti.
Goodnight, I love you.
Labels for this post: stories, selfish, pry
So, I'm going to fill out a silly, trivial survey. Shoot me.
DON'T CHICKEN OUT GIRLS!
Does your Facebook password have to do with a boy?
No, it's a very random code that has absolutely no significance to my daily life and work.
What's one thing a guy can do to make you like them?
A good sense of humor, genuine chivalry, a defined style
Are you a girly girl?
Physically, yes, I love dresses and shoes and I hate bugs. Emotionally, rarely.
Big or small purses?
Depends on the situation
Do you enjoy drama?
Uhhhh no. Not even remotely.
Did you dress up on Halloween?
Always! I was Alice in Wonderland (but not in a creepy schoolgirl fantasy-esque way)
Do you call anybody by their last name?
Lumia...for some people, it's full name basis
How many guys will read this just because it says "FEMALE SURVEY"?
Whooooooooo cares
Can you put on mascara without opening your mouth?
If I want to have war paint or look like Twiggy
Have you ever been called a bad influence?
Yes, generally when it comes to shopping or sex
Eyeliner or mascara?
I use both - I have short eyelashes
American Eagle or Hollister?
Even though neither of them are my style anymore, definitely AE
Heels or Flats?
Flats!!!! Too many of them!
Skirts or jeans?
Jean skirts...what now you mother bitchessss
Straight or curly hair?
Crazy hair! I love my hair!
Hoops or dangling earrining?
Dangles please
Do you prefer light or dark haired guys?
Dark haired, generally speaking, but there are always exceptions to these things
Do you have a best friend?
A few! I'm very lucky :)
Do you like your life?
Considering that there are people who barely live past the age of three and die of starvation and malnutrition and undergo civil wars where they're forced to kill their parents, I love absolutely everything about my overprivileged existence.
Ever walked into the guy's bathroom?
Probably, I don't really remember
Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on?
Yeah! it's fun!
Ever slapped a guy in the face?
Not seriously...I did once punch someone, and I almost broke my thumb
Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
Yes
Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind?
Indeed
Do you ever wish you were famous?
No, all the side effects of fame really turn me off
Preppy or Punk/goth?
I call my style "chic irreverence"
Yeah, it's pretty pretentious
Contacts or Glasses?
Neither...20/20 suckers
Good cook or take you out a lot?
Cook! Let's make dinner - I love cooking, and I am reasonably talented at it too!
Funny or Serious?
Funny, easily. You can tone down funny, but you can't really lift up Serious.
Long or short hair?
For me? Longer hair...for guys, whatever looks better, though I dig "just a little too long" short hair
Smoker or non-smoker?
NON - voice major
Tall or short?
Tall, please, I'm 5'7, babycakes
Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
If I like them too, why not? If not, I very politely decline any sort of invitation and distance myself for a while. It's pretty hurtful at the time, but I think it's better in the long run.
RANDOMS:
If you woke up in one of the Saw movies, do you think you could survive?
No, I seriously doubt it
When was the last time you were in a photobooth ?
I think I was 10, at Hershey Park or something...
Who was the last person you had a sleepover with?
Lindsey Fitz!
Have you ever seen someone you knew and purposely avoided seeing them?
Hahahahahah...yeah.
On average what do you think you cry about the most?
This should be pretty obvious if you know me at all
Do you have a friend of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to?
Yes, one, and it's a tenuous friendship at best
Who was the last guy you talked to?
Spoke to or hollered at? You have to make the distinction. Also, none of your bidness.
Do you think best friends can be replaced?
Replaced, no, but they can sort of fade into the background more, especially if you go to different schools and they never call you or you never call them.
Does the last person you held hands with mean a lot?
Yes - some of my sisters, who are wonderful =)
Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
I hope so. That's what I profess to do as an educator and musician.
Anything bothering you right now?
I have 4 things to prepare for tomorrow, and I'm sick, but I can't sleep because I don't have any time. Otherwise, it's pretty good, I'm kind of hungry, so I'mma make some ziti.
Goodnight, I love you.
Labels for this post: stories, selfish, pry
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